A jewelry store robbery has turned into a hostage situation. The hostage taker has asked for Peralta by name to serve as the negotiator. In order to gauge the current predicament, Jake goes into the building to make first contact. Much to his surprise, he comes face to face with his biggest frenemy, Doug Judy (Craig Robinson), the Pontiac Bandit.
[**Spoilers for 5.13 Ahead!]
Judy’s gotten himself into quite a dilemma. Though he’s given up the criminal lifestyle, his past has caught up with him. Before he got his life on track, he stole the wrong car owned by a big drug lord, Martin Halloway. Not only did he boost the car, he ended up destroying it along with all the drugs in the trunk. In order to pay off his debt, he was forced to rob diamonds from the store. If he doesn’t, they’ll kill his mother. The two might have a layered relationship, but Jake does love Mama Judy so he decides to help. They plan on using the diamonds as bait to arrest Halloway and clear Doug’s name.
With a little assistance from Rosa and a planned heart attack from Scully, Jake and Doug sneak out of the jewelry store undetected. They hole up at a karaoke bar to set up the diamond exchange with Halloway. Since they have some time before the meet up, they jam out to 4 Non Blondes’ What’s Up. I wish they sang Kiss From a Rose though, because it really exploits Judy’s range.
At the drop, things initially go according to plan. Then, Dennis Kole, the original negotiator, finally catches up to them and Halloway runs off. The two cops give chase and apprehend the crime lord, but in all the chaos, Judy slips away with the diamonds. Diaz earlier compared the Peralta/Judy friendship to the frog and scorpion fable, and Jake once again got stung.
Jake is facing disciplinary action for losing the diamonds. While at his desk, he receives a coded message to return to the karaoke bar. Via a prerecorded message, Judy apologizes and says good bye. He also left Peralta some early wedding presents including a recorded CD of original smush jams to help consummate the marriage and a French gray Le Creuset pot. Also, Judy had a change of heart and returned the diamonds by placing them in the pot. Since there was already a prepaid hour for the private room, they go back to their old standby, and continue singing What’s Up.
Meanwhile at the precinct, Holt is in the running for the next commissioner. In order to evaluate the captain and monitor his management style, the big brass send someone to the Nine-Nine. In addition, she wants to interview a detective and chooses Hitchcock. Terry and Holt scramble to prepare the resident creep as to not come off as offensive and ruin Raymond’s candidacy. Fortunately, Hitchcock is able to hold it together (and his farts) for one day and be professional. Also, Gina and Santiago help out at Boyle’s food truck and see a different and disturbing side of him.
This was a very strong and entertaining episode. Doug Judy is one of my favorite characters in the Nine-Nine universe. He is so charismatic and Robinson and Sandberg have great chemistry. Moreover, Robinson has the potential to be a real star when given great writing like here. Unfortunately, he doesn’t always receive it, like on his first sitcom in a starring role, Mr. Robinson or even on Ghosted, and his personality and charm are not enough to compensate.
For most of the show, I always paired Hitchcock and Scully together and didn’t really consider them as separate people. It seems this season they’ve been given more to shine individually rather than being the fat incompetent guys. Dirk Blocker, who plays Hitchcock, has especially embraced the role of dirty old man to great comedic effect. I find myself including him more and more in the favorite line section. Speaking of which, there were so many great lines from this episode, I couldn’t include them all below.
My favorite three lines:
Jake: But did you tell him you went straight? Did you tell him about Dustin?
Doug: I did! He said he doesn’t watch Stranger Things.
Jake: This guy is the worst.
Dennis: We don’t all agree. He’s trapped and desperate. Everything he told you is a lie.
Jake: Why do you say he’s lying?
Dennis: That’s all negotiating is. Two liars lying to each other until one liar stands too close to a window and gets shot in the head.
Terry: Calm down man. We just took her on a tour of the precinct and now she’s at lunch. That means we have one hour to teach you how to behave like a human.
Hitchcock: Oooooh, I see. You’re going to My Bare Lady me.
Holt: My Bare Lady?
Terry: I’m assuming it’s a My Fair Lady porn parody.
Brooklyn Nine-Nine airs Sunday nights at 8:30 pm on Fox.