GRAPHIC DEBATE WITH AMANDA WALLER
BY GRACE RANDOLPHWelcome to “Graphic Debate”! This is a forum where comic book characters fight evil in a very different form: the competitive marketplace. A lot of titles are going to hit the shelves this week and – just as movie stars hit the publicity circuit to tell you about their latest films – we here at “Graphic Debate” offer comic book stars the opportunity to tell you, the readers, about their latest titles.
It’s hard to make a name for yourself in comics. Hero or villain, so many new faces pop up each year, yet few stick around. But one woman has been making her way to the front of the pack. Proving that slow and steady wins the race – let’s give her a warm welcome – Amanda Waller!
(Amanda Waller enters.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Ms. Waller! It’s so good to see you. To be honest, I’m a little surprised you showed up.
AMANDA WALLER: Why wouldn’t I show up?
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Well…y’know –
AMANDA WALLER: No, I don’t know. Why don’t you explain it to me?
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Fair enough. I’ll give it to you straight. You keep it close to the vest, Waller. You’re not a big talker, and you certainly operate on a “need to know basis”. I’d think you’d feel that we here at Graphic Debate don’t need to know anything.
AMANDA WALLER: That’s ridiculous. You need to know what a great job I’m doing for America.
(Pause.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: See…that’s exactly it. Are you doing a great job for America?
AMANDA WALLER: Let me ask you one question. Are you safer?
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Not really.
AMANDA WALLER: That is simply not true! Americans no longer have to worry about being exposed to laughing gas, being flash frozen, or having their city destroyed by rampant radiation. The super-villain is no more.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Yeah, as long as you brought that up, where are all the super-villains?
AMANDA WALLER: Off the streets.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: But where did they go?
AMANDA WALLER: They’ve been contained. I have done what the so-called “heroes” could not. You don’t have to be a stick in spandex to save the world, boys and girls.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: I’m sorry, but are you calling yourself a “hero”?
AMANDA WALLER: Yes. What I’ve done, for my country, is heroic. And as I said, I didn’t need to dress up like a clown to do it. For too long, ordinary human beings like you and myself have felt that we couldn’t make a difference, that we should step aside and let the freaks fix everything. But that simply isn’t the case.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Hmm… Can you fly?
(Suspicious, Waller arches an eyebrow.)
AMANDA WALLER: No. I cannot fly.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Do you have super-strength?
AMANDA WALLER: I’m in excellent shape…but no, I do not have super-strength.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: How about x-ray vision?
AMANDA WALLER: No, I do not. And I can’t shoot lasers out of my eyes either. But I have an entire warehouse dedicated to laser-based weapons. Red, purple, green – any color you want. We don’t have a class-system in America, and that includes not having a super-class. What I can’t achieve genetically I can achieve technologically. And in the end, the mind is the most superior weapon of them all.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: You know who else feels that way? Lex Luthor.
AMANDA WALLER: Lex Luthor is a brilliant man, but his methods are…flawed. However, I can’t help but respect a man who’s been able to stand-up not only to supermen, but to
the Superman.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Interestingly, nobody’s seen Luthor for awhile either. Any ideas as to his whereabouts?
AMANDA WALLER: Why would I know the whereabouts of a private citizen?
GRAPHIC DEBATE: He’s a former president of the United States. Doesn’t the Secret Service – ?
AMANDA WALLER: That information is classified –
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Enough games, Waller!(Grace whips out an issue of Salvation Run.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: It’s all here in DC Comics Salvation Run! We all know that you’ve shipped the super-villains off to another planet!(Waller snatches the copy of Salvation Run and flips through it.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: What do you have to say for yourself now, Waller?!
AMANDA WALLER: Where did you get this?!
GRAPHIC DEBATE: They’re everywhere! Every local comic shop! We know all about how you used your old cronies the Suicide Squad to round up all the super-villains and then boom-tubed them to a conveniently nameless planet!
AMANDA WALLER: (holding up the copy of Salvation Run) These are state secrets! You could be arrested for reading this! In fact, you
will –
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Arrested?! I don’t think so! Ever heard of a The Freedom of Information Act?!
AMANDA WALLER: I – That’s – (to someone off-stage) Get the Secretary of Defense on the phone
now!
GRAPHIC DEBATE: How can the United States defend using Apokolips technology?! This is an outrage!
AMANDA WALLER: What’s an outrage is you questioning a highly regarded member of Checkmate which, by the way, is sanctioned by the United Nations!
(Grace whips out an issue of Checkmate.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Oh we know all about your history with Checkmate! Highly regarded?! I think not!(Waller grabs the issue of Checkmate and looks through it.)
AMANDA WALLER: Everyone’s read this?! This is – this – this is an egregious breach of security!
GRAPHIC DEBATE: I’m on to you, Waller, and I’ve got questions! I –(Suddenly Waller leans in and whispers something in Grace’s ear. Grace freezes.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: What? How did you know - ? Um…
AMANDA WALLER: So, you said you have some questions for me?
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Uh, yeah. I, uh… What’s your favorite color?
AMANDA WALLER: Red, white and blue. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some phone calls to make.
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Yes, go right ahead! Bye!(Amanda Waller exits. Grace turns nervously to the audience.)
GRAPHIC DEBATE: Wow, Amanda Waller, folks! Now there’s an All-American Hero! See you next week on Graphic Debate!
Grace Randolph is a comedic actor and writer in NYC. Her upcoming comics are
Justice League Unlimited #41 for
DC Comics,
Nemesis: Who Me? for
TOKYOPOP's new
Shining Stars program, and the manga
The Adventures of CG! for
CosmoGirl magazine. She's also the host/writer for
TitanTV's "RevYOU" which gets the genuine
pulse of the week's new film releases from real moviegoers who've just stepped out of the theater! Go to
www.TitanTV.com to watch the latest episodes. Grace also studies and performs at
Upright Citizens Brigade. To learn more please visit her website,
www.gracerandolph.com, which is highly informative, not to mention awesome.
*****
Karen Luk is an illustrator based in the San Francisco Bay Area. Her artwork has been exhibited at various venues such as Gallery Blu, San Francisco Design Center and Bay Area
Ladyfest. She recently had a solo show of her illustrations and comics at the Louie-Meager Art Gallery in 2007.
Her web comic Raconteur will resume in February 2008 on Girlamatic.com.
If you'd like to illustrate an upcoming [b]Graphic Debate column, e-mail jencomx3@aol.com for details on how your artwork can appear here.
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